actuallyratchet:

all my friends are v cute. if ur my friend youre automatically cute sorry i dont make the rules 

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  • White people:You have to wait for the facts before you talk about Ferguson!
  • Eyewitnesses:He was on his knees with his hands up.
  • Medical examiner:There was no gunpowder residue on Mike Brown, no sign of struggle, and there were entry wounds on the inside of his arms and the top of his head, implying he was on his knees with his hands up.
  • Convenience store owner and clerk:There was no robbery and we didn't call the cops.
  • Ferguson PD:Okay, we admit it, Wilson didn't know anything happened at the convenience store and we determined no crime was committed.
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  • White people:Nobody can say what happened! We still have to wait for the facts to come in!
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officialunitedstates:

when I was 6 years old we were at the train station waiting for the train and I saw a kid a bit older than me go put a penny on a track and then wait for the train to run over it so it got flat and I got jealous and wanted to outdo him so I but a $1 bill on the track.  that was the day I found out paper is already flat

What kind of fucking adults were around you that let you put money on the train tracks while a train was coming?

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Fuck, my tea.

me approximately an hour after every time I make tea (via psychadelias)
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  • AnonymousHi John, I'm currently in the market for a car and I would really like to get one as 'electric' as possible. Would you recommend the Chevy Volt?
  • fishingboatproceeds

    If you want to get an all-electric vehicle and don’t drive long distances, I really like the Nissan Leaf, which is a great car and a lot less expensive than a Tesla. (If you have all the money in the world, get a Tesla.)

    But if like me you sometimes drive more than 70 miles in a day, then I think the Volt is the perfect car for you. It’s VERY fun to drive—handles brilliantly, good 0-30 acceleration—and I use about 45 gallons of gas a year to drive 7,000 miles. (So I get something like 155 miles per gallon.) Charging is easy and super cheap: It costs me something like 50 cents to get enough electricity to drive my Volt 40 miles. I also haven’t had any mechanical problems.

    The transition from electric to gas mode is seamless, and the interior is almost entirely silent. The sound system is great; bluetooth works perfectly; and because Chevrolet leased a lot of them, you can get a low-mileage used Volt for less than $25,000. (They remain very cheap to lease relative to sticker price.)

    After two years of owning it, the Volt remains my dream car, and I wouldn’t want to drive anything else (not even a Tesla or, like, a Ferrari).

  • Absolute Joke
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  • AnonymousRe: your "rule about naked people" -- How about people who take nude photos of themselves not be stupid and use storage devices that can be hacked, like cloud storage (or take any risks close to that)? Just HOW much personal responsibility does your generation need to shed before you get it through your thick skulls that it only costs $20 for a decent external hard drive these days? :|
  • fishingboatproceeds

    "The lock on your diary wasn’t very good, so it’s your fault I read your diary."

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swanqueenidiot:

Okay so the Colbert Report posted a link to the Ellen Page interview, right

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And I was already happy it was a fan favorite. But THE COMMENTS

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I MEAN

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IT’S JUST TOO GREAT

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ADAM AND EVE NOT ADAM AND MAPLE LEAF

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